talking out the miles

months ago, when I first told myself I wanted to be able to go for a run and enjoy myself rather than feel like I was suffering through some evil mind / lung game, I realized the first thing I needed were running friends.
people that could either suffer with me, or watch me suffer and push me along.
first customer? the husband.
the husband, at that time, was busy hibernating and avoiding all contact with sunlight. no matter how much I begged, it was not going to happen. Fall and Winter are evidently designated as couch-warming, beer-sipping months for the male that I selected to be my life partner. and Spring and Summer, albeit good running months, are for him to push himself and leave the slower-paced wifey in the dust.
second customer? coworker.
she eats yogurt, fruit, and trail mix every single day and avoids ALL sweets and sugars ALL the time. surely she can help me out. and she did. for 2 months. she did my first 5k with me and has been on injured reserve ever since. (me secretly thinks she is pregnant and is avoiding all sorts of impact exercises but she has not admitted to this as of yet)
third customer? previous coworker / hiking companion
sure, he wants to actually GAIN weight so running probably isn't the best thing for him but, he can never turn down a friend. so we run together for a couple months before pains in his leg force him to buy new fancy shoes. different pains arise before he finally heads to a doctor to find out his tendons didn't want him to run afterall. he is now slowly turning his running back on but tis going to be a slow process.
fourth customer? friend I spoke to while drunk at a party
she's a marathoner / constant runner that can go weeks without running and still spit out a solid handful of miles no problem. we run together every weekend, adding a mile every time until finally I do my first 10k with her and it was awesome (minus the chafing). I continued to plan early Saturday runs with her but then cancelled several in a row due to negligent Friday night alcohol consumption. sad, but true. I haven't planned another one yet for fear I would cancel again and feel even more horrible.
fifth and sixth customer? old high school friends
one that just had a baby and one that wants to get in to running for the first time. the 3 of us hit it off really well on the trails and visit them 3 sometimes 4 times a week. we ran a 5k together over at Shoreline and we all did really well. now one of them has pulled muscle groups and has been light on the running. the other is fine.. but this leads me to...
no one is available. the ones that aren't hurt are busy. and it's brought me to desperate measures. I have asked my husband to run with me.
last time we ran together, I did fine. he was not so fine. but he did it anyway. the time before THAT, he was pulling me along in the dead sun (which I am allergic to when it comes to exerting any sort of energy) before he said "come on! you HAVE to pass that old lady!" and so I stopped. time before that, I believe he used the word 'pathetic' when I struggled to run in the sun. my husband is not mean - he is a nice, loving, hilarious, and happy person. but he isn't the best at motivating or.. being available for someone else in a positive way. quite frankly, he intimidates the hell out of me.
the question is, which is more intimidating? running with him, or running solo.
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